Here is what I will do this summer:
I will eat about a thousand pounds of mushrooms, porcini mostly (though I'll also devour ample amounts of hawk's wing, hedgehog, and prince mushrooms). This season is certain to be the most fruitful since I began to forage several years ago. And this year, I will tackle any squirrels, bears, or Polish expats who stand between me and my bountiful fungi-fare. Troublesome empiricists might ask, "What's your evidence to suggest that this year's flush will be so extraordinary, or that your ability to comb the forest floor will have improved?" Such incredulity doesn't even dignify a response. Doubters will go hungry, mark my words.
I will climb all of my projects, thanks to my new found physical prowess (owing to the mushroom consumption, of course). This needs no further comment.
I will summit many of Colorado's proud peaks. In recent years, my desire to be a hard boulderer has taken priority over my desire to be a hardened mountaineer. However, I will find a balance between both ambitions this season. After all, some of my most memorable experiences have taken place on the flanks of some majestic mountain, where I find myself somewhere between physical rupture and emotional rapture. I won't deprive myself of that experience this summer.
I will go on a date, or some such amorous excursion. Seems like high time. I admit, this is the most tentative of my summertime resolutions, as it's the only one that requires mutual inclination. But it seems like a reasonable thought to have in spring, with all of its fecundity. The mushrooms will no doubt aid me in this endeavor as well.
Soon, summer will come to pass judgement on the merit, or folly, of my April ambitions. Until then, they all seem highly plausible.
