Wednesday, May 13, 2009

To be Reincarnated as Glue and Sloppy Joes

      As readers of this blog well know, I've always been a bit lame. Whether or not you've openly characterized me as such, you've certainly perceived a certain underlying lameness in me. 'He's, well, kind of lame...' you've no doubt caught yourself thinking. So I guess it will come as no real surprise as I report on the recent manifestations of my latent lameness. I took a spill on Get Over It a week ago, and tore my left ACL, lateral meniscus, and medial meniscus. I'll be limping into the surgical theater on Thursday, and limping for a while thereafter*. 

        So, with one awkward fall, my summer reading list has supplanted my summer project list. It's just as well (painful, forced smile). I rather dislike climbing in the alpine areas of Colorado in the summer (grinding teeth). The rock quality sucks (red face, bulging blood vessels). And it's not as if I really wanted to send anything (visible madness, thinly-veiled hysteria!!!).  I'm sure I'll take up some other fun "hobby" (single tear...). 

Shit.


* Actually, to be clear, I don't intend to limp anywhere. I intend for Simone to cart me around in a bright red Radio Flyer, while I sip on drinks adorned with little umbrellas and grow smugly corpulent. I will finally realize the full utilitarian component of dog ownership.